The First Day at Nursery: Managing the Separation Gently

09 June 2025

The first day at nursery or with a childminder is a milestone filled with emotion. For the parent, it is often the first big moment of "letting go"; for the child, it is the discovery of a whole new social world. Here is how to transform this transition into a serene and constructive experience.

The Capital Importance of Settling-In

Most childcare settings offer a settling-in period (or familiarisation). This time is not just for the child; it also serves the parents in building a bond with the practitioners. Getting to know the people who will be looking after your child allows you to leave with peace of mind. This stage allows the child to discover their new environment safely and at their own pace. Do not hesitate to express your fears: transparent communication is the foundation of a successful start.

The "Goodbye" Ritual: Building Emotional Security

Even though it may seem difficult, it is essential not to slip away in secret. Explain to your child (no matter their age) that you are leaving, but that you will be back to fetch them after their nap or afternoon snack.

♦ A short ritual

♦ A cuddle

♦ A kiss

♦ A reassuring word

All of this helps the child structure their day and understand that the departure is only temporary. Your calmness is their primary reference point: if they feel you are confident, they will be too.

The Comforter: An Indispensable Psychological Ally

In psychological terms, a comforter (or "doudou") is what we call a "transitional object". It serves as a bridge between the known world (home) and the unknown (nursery). Its role becomes crucial during moments of separation: it carries the reassuring scent of their bed and their parents, providing a stable sensory landmark amidst a new environment rich in stimuli.

When a child squeezes their comforter, they are mobilising their own resources to soothe their anxiety. It is a true emotional companion that helps them manage your absence. To better understand the unique place this precious ally holds in your child's heart, feel free to consult the article The Comforter... !? produced in collaboration with our partner EMODOU.

The Practitioners' Perspective: A Caring Handover

Early years practitioners are trained to handle these emotions. They know that tears are a normal expression of a need for reassurance and are never a sign of a "tantrum". They are there to take over, soothe your little one, and give you honest feedback at the end of the day. Open communication helps the child feel "carried" by a consistent team.

Every parent-child duo moves at their own pace. The most important thing is to trust one another: children possess an incredible capacity for adaptation when they feel emotionally supported and have their faithful comforter by their side to face new adventures.